Why do we get attached to people
- Do you remember confiding in someone in the late hours of the night? (The Emotionally Vulnerable Phase)
- Do you remember meeting someone when you had a very good news to share? (The Joyous Phase)
- Do you remember randomly calling up someone when you were bored? (The Lonely Phase)
- Do you remember seeking emotional support from someone when you were in a bad mood? (The Stress Phase)
- Why did you do that?
- This is because a confession made you feel relieved and emotionally liberated.
- What happened next?
- You went to the same person again when you were happy/ lonely/ stressed/ emotionally vulnerable, the next time.
- You began considering that person, the enigmatic solution to all woes in your life. (The Psychology of Attachment)
- You intentionally or unintentionally made that person, the epicenter of all your emotions.
- What was the aftermath?
- It felt great as long as the other person lasted in your life.
- Once that special person took a sharp exit, you suffered two losses:-
- Loss of that person.
- Loss of the “cure” to all your problems in life.
- How to not get attached?
- Take a walk when you feel bored.
- Treat yourself with food when you feel happy. (The Dopamine Effect)
- Try recounting your past achievements when you feel bad about yourself. (The Self talk Therapy)
- Avoid late night conversations. It is the biggest source of pleasure and pain alike.
- Remember, every attachment in life comes with a significant risk of detachment. So, take your decision wisely.
Credits: Dibakar Dutta